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I am an Air Force wife and mother of three precious gifts from God. I enjoy learning at home with my children, and the many adventures this life sends our way. So stop by often to visit, and check out what the Five Nomads are up to.

Monday, December 7, 2009

Questions and excuses, oh I mean explanations.

A few days ago Brenda asked if I ever disagree with opinions at church, and how I handle it. Well, she knows me, so really she was asking, "How do you handle it when you disagree with others at your church?" --Lorri stop snickering!

Now, I had grand ideas on how I was going to answer this question. Looking up great stuff, and tying it to links. Alas, as my Grandma B. used to say, "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." I fear I am on THE road.

In my defense this mommy thing has really been busy. Mr. Nomad was gone on a trip, we had our F.A.I.T.H. class, and Princess is in the throws of Nutcracker rehearsals. Who would have thought a little mouse, scurry, scurry, scurrying about would need so much practice? So, I've been patiently waiting for this afternoon to blog away.

Enter Bubby and our first visit here to the ER. Yes, I am proud to say I made it over a year without visiting an emergency room. It may be a record for me. The Nomad Kiddos keep me on friendly terms with those nice ER people. Luckily, it wasn't anything a little Dermabond couldn't fix up. It also helps having the ER charge nurse as a good friend and neighbor.

I've never had such a quick trip in and out of the ER. Her being the charge nurse, and the fact that I had her sick child at my house. She gave them the ultimatum: Either get this little guy in and out, or I have to go home and take care of my own sick child. Interestingly enough, they had no problem with Bubby coming in, quickly being seen and booted out the door. I love efficiency.

Now here I am with another day winding down, and I still need to study for my class tomorrow. So instead of that great link filled answer, this is what I have to offer.

Brenda, yes I do sometimes disagree with people at church. However, the beauty of the Catholic Church is there are definite answers to questions. Those answers lie not only in the Bible, but also in the Catechism of the Catholic Church--based on our tradition. So when I don't necessarily see eye to eye, I call one of my smart Catholic friends and pick their brain on church doctrine. We have even been known to consult a priest (thanks Phil!) when we were stumped.

Most importantly, I have learned to try and keep my mouth shut until I get my facts straight. (Read: Tami has had numerous open mouth, insert foot moments.) Not that this is an issue for you, but it is a BIG issue for me. The saying, "God gave you two ears and one mouth, so listen twice as much as you talk." Well, I think that one was meant just for me!

So what do I do when I disagree with church authority or doctrine? Again shut mouth, dig deeper. Most times what I have found is this: When I take the time to explore and learn more about either the situation or church doctrine, it makes sense. An example would be the church's firm stance on birth control. For many years I just ignored church doctrine on this issue, thinking it really didn't work for me. (Stop laughing at me, people. I know I'm a bit dense sometimes.) However, after developing friendships with very devout Catholic women, and learning more about why the church teaches this, I realized the beauty and perfection in this plan.

I could go on and on, I'm pretty opinionated. So there have been many areas of enlightenment for this girl. Of course this submission to my faith has not been an overnight occurrence. I converted to Catholicism before Mr. Nomad and I were married, but I cannot say that I really became Catholic until I began teaching my children about our faith. When I started dipping into the history, the tradition, and the meaning of the rituals and sacraments, it was then I was hooked. Now I cannot imagine anything else.


  1. I have found that when I disagree with someone in our church or with the Church itself, it is because one of us (but never the Church) has a misunderstanding of the Catechism. Just a couple of days ago, I was startled by something we read in my son's 5th grade religion book and after discussing it with my husband, my understanding became clearer.

  2. Well, I think that post is much better than a highly informed, glossy, heavily linked post. Thank you for sharing!

  3. Thanks Tami. I can recall more than a few times being in total disagreement. I did dig deeper once and found the Lutheran church had no stance on the issue. The pastor used the pulpit to promote his own opinion on a social issue. I find myself unable to go with the program when the the person trying to teach it is so obviously wrong. Add my more liberal views, and the committee in my head can take off on it's own mission. This is a lesson that will keep happening until I learn to deal more effectively. God does have a sense of humor where I am concerned, He allows me to indulge in life's lessons. :)

  4. Another good post, Tami! I agree with everything you said. My conversion was a slow one too. Did you know that? I guess we're all always in a state of conversion, huh? Always learning, always altering the way we think about things, always being pushed and prodded by the Holy Spirit in the direction we need to go. The more I learn about the Catholic faith, the more I love it. It really is so rich and beautiful, and it really does (once you understand it) just plain ol' make sense. And the best part - as you've already mentiond - is that it doesn't matter what the committee in anyone's head is saying or doing - Church teaching is Church teaching, and that's that - even if there are some people out there who don't want to accept it. I'm gonna end here before I start ramblin'.


  5. My God loves EVERYONE and ALL PEOPLE, regardless of teachings and understandings. This is my ultimate faith, knowing that I (and ALL PEOPLE) don't have to be any certain way, God has already made a place for me(us) in heaven.

  6. Oh my goodness! I just re-read the comment I left last night, and noticed that it might sound like I was dissin' Brenda. I absolutely was not doing that! No, no, no - not I!! And just so everyone knows, she was NOT the one I was referencing when I wrote "some people." I was thinking more about those who - by their own freewill - call themselves Catholic, but choose not to abide by Church teaching. Sorry if I didn't make myself clear.

    I'm actually right there with you, Brenda. I too believe God loves everyone and all people. Like Tami mentioned before, while the Catholic Church teaches that She is, indeed, the one true Church (and therefore the surest way to salvation), She does not teach that there are no other roads to salvation. Perhaps you're just traveling one of the other roads. Only God, in His wisdom, knows where that road (or the roads ANY of us are traveling) will ultimately lead us.

  7. Well, I did take it personal, and am glad I came back to read more! Funny how it nullified all the things I was thinking, and that's probably a good thing!

    Settling into a "religion" is hard for those who have had it used against them. I am so hypervigulent/sensitive to what others have to say. God is not finished with me yet. When going back to the Lutheran church (formerly the Missouri Synod)--my now husband talked me into it a few years ago---I told him the pastor has to answer 2 questions "correctly"...those being that unbaptized babies have a place in heaven, and women get a vote in the politics of that church. So, I went back. When I moved, an acquaintance invited me to her Conservative Baptist Church, and that's where I heard again, that everyone is going to hell and the Barbie Doll is the AntiChrist. My next plan is to check out the Episcopal Church or another ELCA Lutheran church. It feels a bit empty this year to not have a church during the holidays. I have respect for the Catholic Church, (even though you all are going to hell--according to the MS Lutherans I grew up with ;) I love the idea of confession and absolution, and the churches are always so beautiful (idolatry I was taught). Personally, I think the beauty is a reflection of faith.

  8. I'm glad you came back to read more too, Brenda. I feel much better now.

    Barbie is the antichrist?!! :O
    Oh my, I think I'd better go clean out my girls' toy box! Heehee...